Lies I Believe That Keep Me Off My Knees: I Don’t Have Time
A wise woman once said to me, “Baby, if you don’t have enough time to pray, then you’re doing too much. You might need to adjust your schedule.”
Jaw. On. The. Floor.
She then followed up that wisdom with a knockout punch by asking, “Honey, how do you think you’re going to be able to do all the things you are doing well apart from God’s provision and help?”
If you don’t have enough time to pray, then something needs to change. It’s not a lack of time that keeps you off your knees. It’s a lack of putting first things first.
A dear friend demonstrated this to me. After having her sixth child, homie was still getting up early in the morning to spend time in God’s Word and prayer. Yes, she was breastfeeding. Yes, her newborn was struggling to sleep through the night like all the other newborns. And yes, she was still cooking, cleaning, and tending to the boo-boos of the other five children. Now, granted, at this point in her life, she was kind of a pro at welcoming a new baby into the fold. But, I can’t help but believe that the reason why she was still prioritizing time in the Word and prayer was because she knew she needed Jesus. If motherhood taught her anything, it taught her that she could not do motherhood and disciple women, like me, in her own strength.
Now, here it was, I was in seminary with no kids, full nights’ worth of sleep, and still struggling to get up a little bit earlier in the morning to pray. This was easy for me when I first became a believer. As a college student, I got up at 5 am every morning like clockwork to pray on my knees. I’m talking clockwork. No alarm. Just woke up needy and fully aware I could not live the Christian life on my own. The temptation to return to my old ways was always near. The need for wisdom on how to disciple the women in my small group and share the gospel with the girl down the hall was always pressing. The faith that God could move any and every mountain in my family was unwavering.
But as my experience in ministry increased and the prayers for my family went unanswered, my neediness and confidence in prayer faded. Prayer was no longer a priority. And now, trying to get back into a rhythm of prayer has not felt like clockwork but just work-work.
Instead of just waking up and feeling needy, I wake up and have to remind myself I’m needy. The desire to get on my knees in prayer just isn’t as strong as it used to be. However, I’m learning that I can’t let my feelings be the determining factor in whether I will follow Jesus. Feelings are fleeting. They come and go. Plus, I’m under the impression that God wants to do something different in this season. It’s like he’s taking the “training wheels” of my feelings off the bike and wants me to use my core - my faith in Him - to stabilize my commitment to Him in prayer and obedience.
So, in this season, I have had to commit to doing the work of prayer and not rely on my feeling to get me there. Here are a few rhythms I have implemented to help prioritize prayer in my life:
Confession
The Christian life is not a matter of “faking it, ‘til I make it.” Instead of trying to will yourself to pray, start by confessing your lack of desire for prayer and why. Try to get beyond what’s on the surface to examine what prayerlessness reveals about your heart. Invite God into the process by praying through Psalm 139:23-24. Asks him to search your heart, test, and reveal you’re anxious thoughts. Invite the Spirit to expose your sin and lead you in the most everlasting way.
Start here.
Remember, God is after heart transformation, not behavior modification. Ask Him for help.
Pray For Certain Things on Certain Days
This past year, I started praying for certain things on certain days. It may sound corny and even too structured, but this method has radically changed my prayer life.
Monday’s - Ministry
Tuesday’s - Family
Wednesday’s - Whatever is Pressing
Thursday’s - Small Group Family
Friday’s - Friends
Saturday’s - Personal Growth
Sunday’s - Missionaries serving overseas
These prayer prompts have served me well. They help me focus and no longer go into prayer asking, “What do I need to pray for?” It also kept me from praying solely about myself.
Pray Before and After Tasks or Meetings
Praying before and after tasks and meeting reminds me of my neediness. Before I sit down to write, I do my best to pray and ask God for His wisdom and help. I’m also trying to get into a rhythm of doing this before I go into meeting or go over to a friend’s house. I ask God to help me to listen well because, as I’ve shared before, this is a struggle for me. I ask God to help me to know when to speak and when to sit quietly. To prompt me by His Spirit to ask questions that are helpful and not harmful. I ask him for his help. Afterward, depending on how that time went, I thank God for the ways He showed up for us, ask Him for continued wisdom, and whatever else is needed. This small step reminds me I’m not alone and allows me to be more mindful of God’s presence in my life.
These are things that have work for me. What’s worked for you? What rhythms have helped you prioritize prayer in your life? If you’re an extrovert or just have a hard time focusing in prayer when you’re praying by yourself, consider getting a prayer partner. You don’t get any extra points for praying alone. It’s okay if you need that kind of accountability and help to focus in prayer. If you’re an introvert, maybe journaling or going on prayer walks would help. There’s no “one-way” to having a meaningful prayer life. Consider what works best for you and the way God made you.
Reflection Questions:
What things need to change in your life to make more space for prayer?
Is it that I don’t have time to pray or something else? What other lies could be keeping me from prayer?
What rhythms or structures can you create that can help you to be more intentional in prayer?
Discussion Questions:
What things need to change in your life to make more space for prayer?
If you struggle in the area of prayer, what makes it difficult to prioritize it? If you have a pretty consistent prayer life, what truths or practices have contributed to it?
Are you an introvert or extrovert? How can you utilize this knowledge about yourself to cultivate a more consistent prayer life?
Of the rhythms listed above, which one would you like to try out this week?
Consider how you and your friends can hold each other accountable.
